I Want to be In Love With Jesus

All of my life I have loved Jesus.  I met Him at a young age and accepted Him early on.  I have lived by his commandments and was the typical “good girl” throughout most of my life.  I do not swear, I have never drank, I married pure, I went to a Christian college, I go to church most every Sunday…yadda yadda yadda.  Typical.  What am I trying to say??  I love Jesus.  Always have.  I’ve never questioned my faith, never doubted God, always trusted Him.

But there is so much more!

In my spiritual life I have many ups and downs, and I’m hoping some of you can relate:)  The highs and the lows….and it’s so easy to get so frustrated with you can’t quite get back up to that high with Jesus that you know you’ve experienced before.  Sometimes life gets in my way.

I love God and Jesus with all my heart but lately I am not feeling in love with God.  The difference??  I’m not thinking about Him all the time, talking to Him throughout the day, racing to meet with Him in the morning, yearning to hear from Him about every area of my life.  Humbling….I know!  So this post is for you mom…whom recently told me, I miss your blogs on your faith.  I snapped at her and said I can barely get off a blog about our renovations let alone my time with God.  And then it hit me…what are my priorities??  The new year always brings about resolutions and so I guess this is mine.  To fall in love with Jesus again.  I’m giving God a month, I know..your probably thinking that’s pretty pathetic.  But what I mean is this…I am devoting a month to wake up early and spend time with Jesus and fall in love with Him again.  I’m not saying that I’m going to be done with Him in a month…I’m just saying that I’m excited to see what He’s going to do in my life in this month.  And also I have broken so many promises with God that I’m sure breaks His heart that I figured a month is a good start.

So today is day one, join me if you want:)  I’ll keep you posted and hopefully you will too!  So to end on here is my prayer for the next 30 days I got from the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan..amazing read by the way:)

Jesus, I need to give myself up.  I am not strong enough to love You and walk with You on my own.  I can’t do it, and I need You.  I need You deeply and desperately.  I believe You are worth it, that You are better than anything else I could have in this life or the next.  I want You.  And when I don’t, I want to want you.  Be all in me.  Take all of me.  Have Your way with me.

My 1st True Love

February is the month of love, and while we tend to think of our significant others as the most important love in our life, our first true love should go to our amazing Father in heaven who has loved us from the beginning.  He has been there while we were in our mother’s womb and I want to share my love story with Jesus throughout these last 27 years.

And so it began:

Yes, it’s true…this is me!  I had cheeks that lasted for miles:)  Although I didn’t personally know Jesus yet, my family did, and were raising me in a home where that was first priority. Thank you so much mom and dad for instilling these values into us from this age and on!!

Aww…hehe, can you believe these locks!!  Anyway, kindergarten was the time when I verbally committed myself to Jesus and realized that He lived in me and was Lord. Realized that He died on the cross for MY sins so that I may someday have eternal life with Him.   I may not have truly known what it all meant in a mature way, but faith like a child is amazing!  No questions asked!

Ahh, the awkward middle school years.  These can be some really hard years for a lot of kids, thankfully the Lord really protected me and kept me on a narrow path of following him!

And then high-school.  I must admit, I loved Jesus throughout high-school, and didn’t break any of his “rules” or “commandments” but looking back I realize it must have grieved Him that I didn’t spend much quality time with Him.  I thought being a “good girl” was enough!  I remember constantly thinking, oh in college I’ll really put my “time” in with Him.  I’m going to a Christian school, that will be a great place to become serious about Jesus!  I always pushed it back to a later date.  I realize how lucky I am that I was able to have that later date, that God wasn’t done with me yet, because what a shame to never really truly understand the amazing power and presence and love of the one who created me!!

And college did come…and it was AMAZING!!  You all know that I thought I was going for my MRS. and my DR (diamond ring) which didn’t happen, but the biggest blessing that came from college was the friendships!  I had never been surrounded by girls who shared the exact same values as myself and pushed me to be an even better person.  I saw these girls’ relationships with God that were amazing and wanted that in my life.  This is the first time I truly felt the love and presence of God.  I truly decided that I loved Jesus for myself, not my parents or other people…but for me!  What an amazing feeling, to have your own faith.  I believe that these were some of the easiest years to draw close to God, there were very little distractions and we did live in somewhat of a bubble world being at a Christian school.  I so encourage people to seek out Christian schools, even though they are extremely expensive (thanks Dad!) because the experience you can have there, if you choose to surround yourself with the best people, are priceless!  A big shout out to all my lovely ladies that I adore and thank God for every day, even though I don’t get to see or talk to you that often!!

A little side note, when I was in college we had to share our testimony quite frequently, and I was always a little discouraged that I didn’t have an AMAZING testimony that some other people had.  You know, the God called my name out when I was in the depths of darkness, or I was saved from a life of drugs and alcohol, or whatever it might be.  Makes for a great story, but as I matured and lived in this life…and especially once I had kids, I realized what an amazing testimony it is to be boring!  God allowed me to go through my whole k-12 education without harming myself or doing things I regret.  He protected me from a lot of darkness that is in the world.  I believe he instilled in me since I was born a sense of “doing what’s right.”  Even to this day I can not budge in line or do something that I could remotely get caught at, I am too nervous.  Let’s just say I wasn’t a dare devil.   He also instilled in me a little stubborness, (Sorry mom, dad, and Ry) that I realize can be good if I so choose it to be.  I believe that is what got me through my whole high-school career not taking a sip of alcohol, or kissing a boy.  I believe that is what helped me stand up for my values, and the fact that the Lord did bless me with great friends in high-school as well.  They may not have all challenged me spiritually, but they were great girls.  They  had great morals and made it easy to be with!  Thank you Jesus.

Then comes marriage and family, cause let’s be honest, they were about hand-in-hand for me:)

These have been some of the happiest years of my life, but I have to tell you, they have also been some of the hardest years to maintain a close relationship with my Lord.  I love Him and always will, but that close quality time, feel the goosebump love of God has had its ups and downs.  Maybe it’s because of the dishes, diapers, whines, cleaning, serving, playing, holding, disciplining, reading, snuggling, and everything else that calls our attention throughout the day.  I’m sure you can insert your own!  Maybe it’s because our children tend to consume us since our love is so deep, or because we want to put our focus on creating a better marriage…whatever it is, it is distracting.  When I get some time to myself during the day I want to clean the house, or curl up and read my newest Better Homes and Gardens, or do something for myself.  It is so easy to get sidetracked.  So this is where my story still continues.  How I choose to spend my time and efforts is in my hands now.  There are no excuses…there is only Jesus waiting for me to choose Him.  I know that it will continue to be a roller coaster so I continue to pray God’s mercy on me and strength to persevere, and grace when I fail.  I would love to hear your stories…or encouragement!  I pray God is working in your life today!!


What?!? A Blog?!?

Oh mercy, here we go!  Hi all, first I must say thank you for taking some time out of your day to even check this out, and second of all I must say that I have been on the computer learning new vocabulary and working my brain harder than it has been worked in awhile trying to figure out this “blogging” business.  I know…Allie starting a blog??  It shocked me too, but after a little encouraging by some great friends and prayer deep in my heart I thought that maybe the Lord does have something to share through me, or at least bring some encouragement, ideas, or a laugh or two to all of you.

I am starting The Proverbs 31 Girl blog, at proverbs31girl.com not because I claim to be a Proverbs 31 woman by any means, but because as I look at my life and read that chapter, that is who I strive to be.  Trust me, I fail every day…but it’s good to have a goal right? :) If anyone needs a refresher you can take a peek here.

Proverbs 31:10-31

10An (M)excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far (N)above jewels.
11
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
12
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13
She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
14
She is like (O)merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
15
She (P)rises also while it is still night
And (Q)gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
16
She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17
She (R)girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
18
She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19
She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
20
She (S)extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
21
She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are (T)clothed with scarlet.
22
She makes (U)coverings for herself;
Her clothing is (V)fine linen and (W)purple.
23
Her husband is known (X)in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24
She makes (Y)linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
25
Strength and (Z)dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
26
She (AA)opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27
She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the (AB)bread of idleness.
28
Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
29
“Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
30
Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who (AC)fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31
Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates.

Wow, challenging huh?  I know, like I said…it is a goal:)  But through this blog I do hope to encourage, challenge, entertain and also learn with you some of these truths.  The areas I specifically hope to cover are:

  • Marriage
  • Parenting
  • Making a house a home/decorating ideas & projects
  • Thriftiness/ living life on a budget!!
  • and…whatever else inspires me:)

I hope you can walk away with something from this blog, please be patient with me as there is still a lot of jargon this girl needs to learn to set up this sight successfully, so come back often and see the changes made.  Thanks again and  I am excited to share my life journey with you….