OH HOW I’VE WAITED…..

When we found out at 26 weeks that Jules was deemed “incompatible with life” all I could think of was how I wish this “trial” in our life would pass.  Meaning just that.  That I wouldn’t have to carry this child any longer that I knew I couldn’t keep.  That God would take her right then and there.  That I could push it all behind me and start over.

Raw but true.

Little did I know the blessing the Lord would give us.  And the funny thing is this, while others said that they would never have been able to do it, I was so grateful God CHOSE us to do it.  Not right away at first, but it came.  It came after we chose to give thanks to God for this precious life.  It came when we saw the body of Christ be Jesus to us.  It came when we felt Jesus in a way we’ve never felt before, as indescribable peace, and it came when God said, “I got you, I’m not leaving you.”

And we were blessed.

Blessed with a girl we couldn’t keep.  Blessed with a treasure more precious than jewels.  Blessed with an experience richer than anything this world can offer.

After Jules left us though, although we were all the richer for having her/knowing her/holding her, we were still left with a hole in our hearts.  A yearn for a precious baby.  That bundle that sleeps on your chest for as long as they will let you put them there.  The yearn for little footsteps again and babbling talk and giggles.  A yearn for another baby.  A yearn we thought the Lord would grant us easily because of what we had gone through.  But one that ended up coming in patience.

And testing.

Testing when we lost another baby to a miscarriage 8 months after Jules was born.  Testing when we had months with no results, when normally it was so easy for us.  And questions.  Maybe the Lord wants us to be done?  We need to be happy and content with the two precious kiddos we have.  And we are so happy with them.  Trust me when I say I don’t write this post to get pity, because I have encountered so many want to be mommas out there that are dealing with infertility and years upon years of trying.  And for this my heart aches.  But the reason I write this is because our timing, our ideas, our happily ever after does not depend on how many kids the Lord chooses to give us.  It doesn’t depend on how easy our lives are.  It doesn’t depend on the things we acquire or the accomplishments we achieve.  Although so often that’s how we gauge it.  Our happiness and content rests in the fact that Jesus is our Lord.  That He loves us through all the difficulties.  That everyday He desires to pursue us and show us His peace and love that He wants to offer so freely if we let Him.  And that this world is not our home….it is our waiting place until we can enter into His presence.

Trust me when I say this is a lesson that I am learning a little bit more of everyday.  That it is hard to see past the facade of this world, the media, the materialism, the judgement and the list goes on.  It is hard to keep our eyes focused on the one true thing that matters.  But that is our call.  And I have learned that when that is what we do, when we keep our eyes focused, the blessings come.  They came through a little girl that we got to love on for 38 days, and they came through this sweet little peanut…

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Whom we got the pleasure of seeing a week ago.  A little sweet pea that appears to be healthy!

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and that waved to us with OPEN hands, which was a huge blessing to see.

We told our family right away so that we could have extra prayers for peace for this babe.  Our minds can become our enemy if we let them wander, but God was so gracious to give us peace and enjoy every moment so far:)

Remember this picture…

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The one I had to totally crop because we wanted to get the green light that everything looked good on the ultrasound before we publicly shared…

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and can now show off the baby belly I love!

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We are 21 weeks today, and oh so excited to welcome a sweet little bundle into the world around August 21st!  Ryan has never wanted to find out the sex of any of our babes.  He would say we compromised and found out with all three:)  Good guy too.  So this little peanut will be a surprise.  And I must say I’m quite excited for it!

I so wanted to share this fun news with you all because you have been such a huge support through our lives, and many of you who we have never even met have said prayers for our family.  We are so humbled and we love you:)

19 weeks and counting….

 

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28 Comments

Category: Faith, Family


28 Responses to OH HOW I’VE WAITED…..

  1. Angel Anderson says:

    Hi Allison

    Congrat’s on your upcoming new addition! :-) I am hoping to finally come to one of you sales that people speak so highly of!!!

    Take Care
    Angel

  2. Shannon Walsh says:

    Yay Allie!
    I’m so happy for you! Life is so short, and totally worth celebrating the good things in life. Your story gives me hope:). Love the baby bump!

  3. Relle says:

    I found your blog when you were pregnant with the beautiful Jules. I just love your home and your style. I often check to see if you have a new post up. For about a year as my computer is loading your site, i pray that God will give you the baby that i know you are praying and beleiving for. I prayed as usual as your site was loading and was in tears when i read this post that you were pregnant. God is good. So excited for you.

  4. Eva says:

    My warmest Congrats to you Allie & your family….You are such an incredible young woman of God. Your stories warm my hear! Will pray for continued blessings & health for all of you:) Eva

  5. Katie says:

    Oh my goodness, congratulations!! So thrilled for you. :)

  6. Lynn Driver says:

    I am so happy for you. You speak with such wisdom for your age. Your precious post brought me to tears. Congratulations!!

  7. Sharon says:

    So happy for you and your sweet family!

  8. Keri says:

    Congratulations. This must be the perfect timing for your newest blessing blessing.

  9. Theresa Frericks says:

    Allie and Ryan, I am sooo happy for you both. God is so good.

  10. Alyson says:

    I’m not sure how I found your blog, but I’ve loved reading about your sweet family! So VERY happy for you!!! He is faithful! Praying for a healthy baby and peace for your family:)

  11. Monica T. says:

    Yay! Congrats to your beautiful family :) I always read your blog while I’m at work and I had to stop the tears from flowing. I’m so overjoyed for you Allie. I can’t wait to follow your pregnancy. You are glowing, so happy for you!

  12. candice kisner says:

    Beautifullly written as always! All my happiness is given to you. Congratulations!

  13. Christine says:

    YAY! Congratulations!!! I’ve followed your blog ever since your Jules was born, and I am so thankful for your testimony and sharing your story. So happy for you guys!

  14. Cheryl Thielen says:

    I am thrilled beyond words for you all! Congratulations! I will continue to pray for you, your family, and this new babe. Praising God and lifting you up in prayers.

  15. Emily says:

    My sweet friend! I love seeing this post! I am so overwhelmed with joy and thankfulness every time I think of this baby. We are all so, so happy for you and Ryan! I’m so thankful for the way you have shared your heart through all of this. It has been a blessing to be your friend and see God’s hand in your life. “…and so we know and rely on the love God has for us…” 1 John4:16 xoxoxo

  16. Janelle Dobbins says:

    Congratulations!!! That is so exciting! And you look gorgeous! God is so good!!

  17. Allie says:

    Congratulations and many continued blessings to your family! We just welcomed our 4th and final babe to the house and it makes me so sad to see all those firsts come and go even though shes only 4 months old! As the saying goes…they days are long but the years are short, cherish the moments :)

  18. Rosann Maher says:

    I have a coworker that saw your blog. So happy for you and your recent pregnancy. I work for Hutchinson Health and your story would be great to cover as your pregnancy deveolps. Would you consider sharing with us?
    Let me know,
    Thanks,
    Rosann
    rmaher@hutchhealth.com

  19. Lynn Hough Kinzel says:

    Just thrilled to hear your news!

  20. Peg says:

    Congratulations and I am so very happy for all of you! This baby truly is a gift from God above. Juliet taught us all just how precious the gift of life is. Praying for his blessings and continued good health for all of you as you welcome a new little one in a few months! He/she will be so lucky to have you for their family and a beautiful angel to watch over you all!

  21. Andi says:

    Hugs and loads of congratulations for you guys! I am friends with the Gansers and I know how excited they are for you and what wonderful friends you are to them. Best of luck and I can’t wait to follow along on your journey with the new baby!

  22. Audree says:

    CONGRATULATIONS! God certainly has a plan. :)

  23. Terrae Gorney says:

    Oh Dear Allie (and family)!!!! We are praising God with you and so very excited for ALL of you. :)

  24. Laurayne Velasco says:

    I am beyond excited for you, Ryan and the sweet kiddos. One thing is for sure…this little babe will be loved beyond anything it can comprehend. Saying prayers for everything good and God’s faithfulness in creating another little Lundeen! Congrats!! (((hugs)))

  25. Pamela Riebe says:

    Oh Allison!!! I am so happy for all 6 of you!!!! That’s including this new bundle of joy and its big sister up in heaven! Gods blessings on you and sending you lots of love and joy!!!!

  26. Oh Allie! CONGRATULATIONS!! I am so excited for you and praising God for His goodness and faithfulness. I will be praying for the rest of your pregnancy to continue to be healthy and that the truth of God’s loving faithfulness will push away any lies from the enemy.

    Love,
    Heidi

  27. Chris says:

    Congratulations and may the Lord bless you and your family today and always

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