True Love

Ryan is my one true love.  He was the first man I ever said “I love you” to….and he will be the only man.

Not because of his good looks….which are rather cute if I say so myself.

Not because of his quick wit and charm….which he is full of.

Not because of his handy skills or desire to keep me home or his love for the Lord, which trust me..he has it all:)

But…because of our commitment to Jesus.

Seriously.

It really has nothing to do about Ryan and I. Ha! But it’s true.  It has everything to do with the covenant we entered into with the Lord the day we both said “I do.”

Luckily for me I really truly love this man with all my heart.  I am not perfect (shh…don’t tell Ryan, I think I still have him fooled:)  or that he’s not perfect, or that we have slept in different rooms, yelled at each other, pursued counseling, grieved together, rejoiced together, shared together, experienced life together.  Basically my point is this….

Marriage.Is.Not.Easy!!!!!!

It never surprises me when Hollywood couples break up after 1 year, 5 years, or even 25 years.  I am always a bit sad, but never surprised.  If we were to not understand the true definition of marriage I’m pretty sure Ryan and I wouldn’t have made it either.

But who ever told us it would be easy??  Why do we think it should be all butterflies and lollipops?? The world tells us that once the “spark” is gone, we can leave too.  Keep ourselves happy.  But that’s not true.

My mother-in-law gave me the book called Sacred Marriage when Ryan and I first got married, and it really opened my eyes and it resonated with me.  It is so powerful.

It’s written by Gary Thomas and the full title is:

Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy

Your marriage is more than a sacred covenant with another person. It is a spiritual discipline designed to help you know God better, trust him more fully, and love him more deeply. Scores of books have been written that offer guidance for building the marriage of your dreams. But what if God’s primary intent for your marriage isn’t to make you happy. . . but holy? And what if your relationship isn’t as much about you and your spouse as it is about you and God?

Everything about your marriage–everything–is filled with prophetic potential, with the capacity for discovering and revealing Christ’s character. The respect you accord your partner; the forgiveness you humbly seek and graciously extend; the ecstasy, awe, and sheer fun of lovemaking; the history you and your spouse build with one another–in these and other facets of your marriage, Sacred Marriage uncovers the mystery of God’s overarching purpose. This book may very well alter profoundly the contours of your marriage. It will most certainly change you.

Because whether it is delightful or difficult, your marriage can become a doorway to a closer walk with God, and to a spiritual integrity that, like salt, seasons the world around you with the savor of Christ.

So, if you are desiring more for your relationship, or if you are in a rocky patch…search out this book.  It will change your view.  And I have to tell you, when you live like this, God will bless it!  I can honestly say that at the moment Ryan and I are enjoying each other more than we ever have.  The love, the respect, the understanding has never been deeper.  I might not have said that 2 weeks ago:) but that’s the beautiful thing about marriage, it can always be improved worked on, and change!

Thank you Lord for your gift of marriage, and for my Valentine!

Love you baby!!


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10 Comments

Category: love


10 Responses to True Love

  1. Laurayne Velasco says:

    As a re-married widow whose first husband admitted 3 months before he died that he had been involved in a 6 year affair with another woman in Europe while stationed there in the Army, I can hardly wait to read the book! It was not easy forgiving my late husband but it is what I was called to do and I think it was then that I experienced a “holy moment” in my marriage. The best part is that Bob died knowing that he was loved and FORGIVEN. God’s blessing came when I met and married my “new” husband who is TRULY God’s gift to me!!Thank you for the recommendation.

  2. Angela says:

    So well written! My understanding of our marriage has always been, we’ve been blessed w/a helpmate to get us to heaven. We live by that in our life and marriage and when things get rough, the bussle of everyday life gets us all worked up, we remind each other of what’s the most important and it’s helped us through every single time. The daily hubbub all the sudden doesn’t matter at all because we know it will pass and it’s so unimportant compared to eternity! Will be coming up on 8 years this summer and I was just thinking yesterday of how sad it is that so many give up on their marriage because it gets better every year (or at least it seems like it has for us:). We dream together, work together, play together and raise our family together. It’s an amazing gift from God to be blessed with a helpmate and I thank him all the time for the blessing he’s given me. I feel so incredibly lucky and am humbled by how perfect God’s selection was for me:-) SO happy to hear you and Ryan are in a wonderful place of the journey right now!

  3. Dianne Shoultz says:

    Allie,such very true words,so well spoken,after 40 years of marriage,for me you totally got to the bottom of it all!I look forward to reading that book,after all we can always learn something new!It seems you and Ryan already know what we learned after many years of marriage!Thank you so muc for sharing!

  4. Cheryl Thielen says:

    Thank you for sharing this Allie. I am in the midst of a divorce. My husband is no longer in love with me and does not want to be married to me…..I will leave it at that. You are right, marriage is not about being in love and happy, but rather being holy. Those things are what becomes of a holy marriage. I look forward to reading the book.

  5. Angela says:

    Well said1 You’re such an inspiration. Thank you so standing up for what is right!

  6. Kim says:

    LOVE that book. Definitely changed my perspective on marriage. We’ve been giving this book as a wedding gift to couples!

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