I was sitting in church this Sunday, listening to amazing worship and a great sermon, and for some reason I just felt this fog over my heart. I was hearing the words but just couldn’t seem to make them affect my heart. Maybe it was the 11 month old squirming on my lap, or the fact that I feel like I’ve been tired for the last 11 months straight. But deep down I knew it was something more. Deep down I knew it was because I wasn’t ALLOWING God top priority in my heart and Satan was doing all He could to keep me from Him
I was sitting in church and I felt like the Lord was telling me to get rid of the distractions.
Obviously I can’t get rid of my children:) ha! And honestly I knew that’s not what He was talking about. I COULD get rid of the screens though, and that’s where I felt like He was convicting me.
I’m not sure if anyone else has this problem, or if I’m alone in it, but I go to bed at night and usually the last thing I do is scroll through my Instagram feed before I shut the lights out. And in the morning, when Beckett wakes up a little too early, I buy some time with him in my bed and I scroll through Facebook, or Pinterest, or whatever app is speaking to me.
IT’S THE FIRST THING I DO IN THE MORNING AND THE LAST THING I DO AT NIGHT!
I even feel like throughout the day my phone has control over me. Every time I walk past it I just nonchalantly push that little home button to see if I missed a super important text message, phone call, or notification. Like my life would end if I didn’t get it til 3 hours after the fact. If I’m bored for one second I think, let’s just see if anyone posted anything interesting. And then I get sucked in for another 30 minutes.
I’m making it sound as though I’m on my phone all day, and honestly I’m not. The problem comes though when I’m MORE INTERESTED on what’s on my phone than I am interested in what THE LORD IS SAYING TO ME.
You see, lately I feel like God’s small voice has been voided out due to over distraction, business, entertainment, and lack of priorities on my part. And I feel like so many of these distractions are Satan, keeping us apart from the one he hates. So this Sunday, I finally decided to do something about it. I told the Lord I would give up screens (which included my beloved Today show) for a week. I know it sounds silly, ONE WEEK, but you guys, I have to set realistic goals that I can achieve. And I’m hoping that after one week I have enjoyed my screen free life so much, that I can see a screen for what it is. A tool, not an obsession.
So this morning was my first true test. Of course Beckett woke up the earliest he’s woken up all month, (and no, I don’t think that’s a coincidence) so where I’d normally let him sit and play on my bed while I “woke up” with my bff –my phone, I played with him instead. I came downstairs once I could function, and instead of making my coffee and turning on the Today Show, I grabbed my Bible and a book I’ve had for a few months now that has been collecting dust and started reading. I read, EVEN WHEN MY KIDS WERE AWAKE! Cause that’s just it. I had told myself before that I need the perfect quiet time to spend time with Jesus. The circumstances have to be just right. And in all reality, I probably have another 18 years of non-ideal quiet time with the Lord. And if I’m being even more truthful with myself, it was just an excuse, because when I did get the baby to bed, my priorities changed again to I have to get the house cleaned, or that project finished up, or anything else I could think of before spending time with Jesus.
So this morning I sat down with the book called, “What Happens When Women Walk in Faith,” by Lysa TerKeurst. And you guys, the Lord NEVER ceases to amaze me! The whole first chapter was designated to finding our calling, each and every one of us, and more importantly, how SATAN, tries to steal that from us. How he will distract us and make us doubt so that we feel so inadequate we don’t even try. She even wrote that the word Satan means…wait for it…..ONE WHO SEPERATES.
His chief purpose is to separate us from God however he can. He wants us to chase after other things—even good things—so we miss God’s best. He wants to keep us busy. He wants to fill our heads full of lies to that we can’t hear God’s truth.
I heard you Jesus. Thanks for the confirmation.
James 4:7 says, “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
and then goes on to say in verse 8, “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.”
So this week I choose to resist the devil, by taking away his power over me through the distraction of screens. I know this is one weakness that he attacks in my life. So if I don’t seem to “like” your picture or comment on your cute post, it’s not because I’m mad at you:) It’s because I am re-training my mind, clearing my head, and resisting the devil. And I just want to clarify that I do not think these things ARE the devil. I have seen so much good come from social media through our own experience with Jules and it allows us to connect, encourage, and pray for people that we probably wouldn’t have before. But I think these things can be a TOOL the devil uses to distract and push us away from communion with Jesus if we aren’t careful, and in my life, I knew he was doing just that.
If anyone wants to join this journey with me, I’d love it! And I’ll still check my comments on here and hopefully we can encourage one another. I still plan on blogging, I just won’t be scrolling:) For one week that is. I can do this. We can do this. And Lord, draw near to me:)